- When I was at the airport to pick you up, I wanted to be the one recognising you and dad first. But it surprised me when you came out and was able to spot me sitting at a bench even before I could recognise you. This small thing touched my heart so much. How could you do that, mum? How could you find your own daughter even more quickly than she found you? How could you manage to make me feel so special?
- When you fixed my eyebrows yesterday, I felt like all I needed was a mom. Do you know that I have always wanted my eyebrows fixed, and you’re the only one noticing that? Do you know that when I saw you and me reflected in the mirror, my heart is filled with gratitude? I thanked God because He showed me His great compassion through you, Mum.
- When I walked around with you in the department store, you told me your skin had worsened and thus you needed more cosmetics to improve it. First, I want to assert that you look beautiful no matter what. Second, can I just make a prayer that I know will never come true? That you will be with me forever?
- When I saw a message that I should not have seen today, the world collapsed in front of me for a moment. But a few minutes later, I decided to forget and forgive. Mum, you’re a human being and you’re not perfect. Because you have forgiven me so many times, I want to do the same. Humans have selective memory for a reason: we can choose what we want to remember about the people we love.
- When you constantly chastised my way of dressing this time, I was deeply annoyed. But at the same time I felt happy, too. I guess it has been a long time since I heard your complaints about me. I miss them.
- When you kept asking me “Where’s Mai?”, I felt loved. I thought when you came here this time, your focus would be the niece and I would recede to the background. Yet, you always kept track of where I was, how I was feeling, and how I enjoyed the food. Nobody has done that to me for quite a long time. I miss it, Dad.
- When you looked at me, I could see lots of love in your eyes. I’m not usually sensitive to these things, you know. But for some reasons, when it came to you, I can see the overwhelming love you have for me so clearly and evidently.
- When you asked me to open the luggage for you because you could not read the key numbers clearly, my chest hurt. I know you’re still healthy, active and energitic. But I am also aware that you’re aging, and you are no longer the daddy who can totally do anything. Now, you also need me, too. It’s fine. It’s just a bit depressing as suddenly the fleetingness of this world becomes so apparent.
To both Mum and Dad,
- I know that to you, I am the centre of the universe, onto whom you put your love, hope and trust. I really wonder if there will be anyone who can love me that much in this world.
- But I am not the centre of the universe. I’m a mortal human being who still tries to figure out this life. I can’t be indulged forever. Please let me decide my life, stand on my own feet, make decisions, both right and wrong, and learn from them.
- I know that you are living a quite comfortable life, and trust me, I’m really happy for you. However, I also pray that you would not be lost in the material deceits of the world. I pray that you could find God.
- And thank you. Thank you. Thank you billions of times.